Day 29. OPEN YOUR SCOPE.


Is this damn challenge over yet? I cheated! My brother said “well don’t waste your whole blog writing about it, I already know about it, write about something I don’t know.”

So quickly, I had some ranch, cream in a starbucks coffee and a cake pop and some chocolate chips. Over the course of 2 days. I have zero guilt. Also, I have zero desire to eat bullshit.

Although believe me, I’m going to have a piece of cake on Wednesday. But I don’t have the desire to go out and eat fast food for every meal. I don’t want to just mindlessly eat things out of convenience or temporary satisfaction. It’s just the balance that we all crave and spend time looking for.

I guess I should share the news. On Friday I went to go visit a dog. I’ve been wanting to adopt a dog for a few years. It was never quite right. Then when I got to Texas and was alone again I thought it would be a great time. I was never convince I was ready, financially even aside from being at work. Then I just sort of stopped thinking about it until I got my new job.

Now I have the time and financial stability to take care of a dog. I always envisioned cute, fluffy, hefty, personality coming out of his ears type dog would suit me best. Over the past few weeks I’ve seen how competitive it is to adopt. All the cute ones go in days, if not hours. It’s a very fast process if you’re the right fit. It’s just like dating online – hundreds of pictures and profiles to swipe through, but there are some criteria both parties have to fit.

The first few I was interested flew off the shelf, I was feeling hopeless. Then I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond last weekend. I never shop there. However, it’s next to my apartment and I wanted to see if they had anything good on clearance. They had a vacuum. A $100 vacuum marked down to $40 because the box was crushed during shipping.

Seriously, it was my lucky day. I needed a vacuum. Also, I asked a question to the lady working in that section and that led to a conversation about dogs which led to 3 more conversations about dogs with her co-workers. One of the ladies I was chatting with mentioned that black dogs are the least likely to get adopted. I couldn’t understand that to be true, but I took her word for it and when I went home I filtered the search with only black dogs.

There were 4 that caught my eye. Out of those 4, I met one. She is not what I envisioned. She’s dainty and not fluffy. She’s small, but not tiny, but certainly not hefty at all. In fact, I had a phone interview first with the foster mom to see if I was a good fit. The day before, I almost emailed and said never mind, I’m not interested in her any more. Then I decided I’ll just do the phone interview and see what happens.

In that hour plus chat I had with the foster mom I learned this little girl’s story and that I was the ideal home for her. I told my mom that and she, like me, reminded myself to not get attached to the story and not the dog. I went on Friday to meet her and was impressed with how much pretty she is in person. AND THAT is why they say black dogs don’t get adopted as frequently as lighter colored animals – because black dogs don’t photograph well!

Who knew.

Anyway, I ended up spending almost 2 hours with the dog and the foster mom, sitting on the floor inching in for her to finally let me pet her. I think we all know where this is going – I’m picking her up on Friday for keeps.

Actually it’s a 2 week trial period to see if it is indeed a good fit and then I have final say. When I left after meeting her on Friday I didn’t know how I felt. I felt conflicted. I knew she wasn’t what I had always pictured, but that didn’t mean I didn’t already kind of love her. Still it took me the rest of the night to decide, which was about 2 hours later.

However when I woke up on Saturday I didn’t immediately call or text the foster mom that I wanted to take her. Instead, I got up and made coffee and got in my Sunday chair and just relaxed and listened to music and wrote. I had a really wonderful time and enjoyed it. At one point I had wondered what it would be like to have a dog here and what kind of dog would fit into that exact scene. The answer was the dog I met. She would be a perfect fit for my current lifestyle.

So then I started thinking about if the real decision I was making wasn’t “is this type of dog okay” but really “am I really, really, really, really ready for a dog?!” That decision took the rest of Saturday. It was a mixed bag of thoughts and emotions of feeling more tied down, sort of. She’s a pretty petite dog, so in theory I could travel with her. However still, it was foreign territory for me to really be considering taking care of something else.

As per the movie 28 days. I got a plant. Actually a few because I killed most of them. But two lasted. I figured that meant I was responsible enough for a pet.

I thought it was time to think past me. I think getting a dog is a great way to get outside of my own head. i’m pretty nervous for the two week trial but also feel like it will be instinctive almost immediately. I’ve already bought her some toys.

The realization I had this weekend was about opening your scope. Remembering times when new things were introduced to me. Lives can change so quickly and sometimes we’re not aware of the moment that makes them change. Sometimes it’s obvious like meeting someone, having a kid, taking that job or quitting that job. For me, it’s this moment that I’m going to adopt a dog. My scope of life just opened a little more.

I hadn’t really thought of it like that before, that you could only be taking in a small scope. I try to be aware of as much as possible but one could never be aware of everything. So as we introduced things into our worlds, our small worlds grow larger. This is certainly a next chapter. There are a lot of changes happening. I think there are a lot more just around the corner…

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